If I am your Referee

First of all, let me tell you how surprised I was that you have chosen me to be your Referee yet you have not asked me to play that role.

Secondly, let me tell you how astounded I am that you have not contacted me over the course of two days, during which I have been receiving calls from employers wanting to confirm our working history.

Thirdly, let me tell you how difficult it was for me to try to pin your identity down, when the names you have given to your potential employer are not the “other names” you have used in the past, including the ones that are on your facebook account.

And, let me tell you how awkward it felt for me having to try to remember the work or project I’ve done with you. I have done quite a bit with many people in the recent years, you know. Touching base with me before submitting your CV to employers would have made things easier for all of us.
As I was writing this to you, my head was sore after scratching it for a long time trying to remember who you are.

Let me tell you how frustrated I was when, after discovering who you are, I tried without success to get hold of you on the phone. I do not have your number.

I am not done yet.

So let me tell you how doubtful I am about my contribution to your prospects of you getting that job. Not after that dodgy reference I have given about you. Which employer tolerates being asked to phone the next day, and the next day, simply because the Referee is not in the clear about who we are talking about? A simple “Sorry employer, I don’t know who Sepamo Mashaya is’ from me would have sealed your fate. Not only did I try to keep your credibility intact this morning. I was fighting tooth and nail to defend my own reputation.

If you have ever asked me to be your referee, then I apologise for having a short memory. But if you have not done so, I am damn well justified to give you a dressing down about this! So why, in the world where people a trying new ways to land a job, are you calling yourself Trigga-happy Molesta on facebook? Have you not heard of Oskido and his 5 year jail term which has the country divided down the middle? Okay; Oscar Pistorius. I hope you get the point.

Let me tell you how embarrassing it is going to be, and career limiting it might be, when the employer confronts you about the mis-match of information which came from you and me. Ausi, on the second day the employer pinned me down, I found myself piecing things together so that you could get that job.

Before I let you go… Referees can stand between you and the job. History between Referee and Applicant, including a ridiculous thing like the mood of the latter, are critical.

Another thing is, Referees who have vouched for somebody who was not what they claimed to being have found themselves in trouble. So no one is taking the role of being referee lightly these days. Think for a minute about a person whose name is appearing in the Referee section of the CV of the SABC Chairperson. That Referee is not sleeping well at night, judging by the developments of that matter.

Good luck with getting that job. Now I am done.